Welcome to Let Them Feel It: How to Attract Clients Without a Pitch - a series of weekly modules to help you get paid to do the work you love.
This course covers mindset, strategy and tactics to explore the ways that you can create an ecosystem of paid work to support your heart-led vision.
It’s based on my experience of running a social enterprise for over twelve years and attracting funding of over £750K.
Previous modules:
🎓 Module 1: Connection vs Preaching
Quick Note: If you’d like to buy the full course and gain access to weekly Q&A you can get it here👇🏼
Language matters.
One of the biggest things I had to learn—through trial, error, and falling flat on my face more times than I can count—was this:
Language matters.
Not in the way most people think, though. It’s not about sounding polished or clever. It’s not about the perfect elevator pitch or having all your bullet points lined up in a pretty PDF (although that can help later on).
It’s about how you speak. Where you’re speaking from, and whether the person you’re speaking to can hear what you’re saying.
When I first started trying to talk about the work I do, I used all the words that made sense to me. Words that were new and shiny and exciting. Things like “inside-out,” “thought-created reality,” and all this big, floaty stuff that felt profound and deep.
And to the average person?
It sounded like absolute tosh.
I didn’t know I was doing it at first. I thought I was helping. I thought I was explaining. I thought if I just said it the right way—if I used the right words—they’d understand and get as excited as I was.
Spoiler: They didn’t.
In fact, most people just glazed over. Or smiled and backed away.
And the more I talked, the worse it got. I’d start trying harder. Using more words. Louder words. Bigger explanations.
It was a mess.
Because here’s the truth:
If they can’t hear you, it doesn’t matter how right you are.
You could have the most life-changing insight in the world. You could be offering something that could save somebody's life. But if you’re speaking a different language—if you’re speaking from your world instead of meeting them in theirs—they’re not going to get it.
And it’s not because they’re stupid.
It’s because the words you’re using don’t mean anything to them yet.
We forget that we’re the weird ones.
We’re the ones who’ve spent months or years in this world of transformation. We’ve read the books.
Watched the videos. Sat in the conversations. We’ve heard these terms over and over until they feel normal.
But to most people?
It’s nonsense.
It’s noise.
It’s “woo woo.”
And if you want to connect, you’ve got to drop the jargon.
Now I’m not saying water it down or pretend to be someone you’re not. That’s not what this is about. What I am saying is:
Speak to where they are.
Use everyday words.
Say what you mean.
Tell stories.
Ask questions.
Listen.
Get curious.
Meet them in their world, not yours.
Because the best conversations I’ve ever had, whether with a psychologist, a prison governor, or someone fresh out of detox, started with me shutting up and listening. Feeling out where they were coming from. And then speaking from that place.
When I first started, I was full of passion, but also full of trying to convince.
I didn’t mean to, but I had an agenda. I wanted people to get it. I wanted them to say, “Yes! Come in and run your program! Take our money! Let’s change lives!”
But people can feel when you’re trying to persuade them. They can feel when you’re coming in with an agenda. And that energy? It shuts things down.
What works is curiosity. What works is presence. What works is connection.
And that means checking your language.
It means noticing when you’ve slipped into in-crowd lingo. It means being willing to pause when someone looks confused or pulls back.
It means asking, “Where are they right now?” instead of “How do I say this better?”
Because sometimes it’s not about how you say it.
It’s about who you’re being while you say it.
Story Time
Back in 2017, I’d been running a group in prison every week for six weeks. The same guys attended each week. I was talking about essence, nature, and how we’re all one. You know, all the poetic stuff that seemed to make sense in my head but sounded like another language to anyone listening.
There was a guy who’d sat frowning at me each week. A bus driver in life with such an angry face, I thought he’d scare his passengers off!
This particular week, I talked about how we have a knowing inside that guides us.
“Oh!” The guy said. His angry face lit up with a big smile. The hot prison group room seemed still. Fifteen men waited to see what he’d say. I felt a blush of anticipation. My blue polo shirt felt hot against my skin on the sticky August day.
“You mean sixth sense!” he said.
THAT’S how he made sense of it.
It’s not the way I would have put it, but it meant something to him. We talked some more and he’d nailed it.
I realised I have to talk with more simplicity. More clarity. I have to share in a way that people don’t have to grapple with it. That they can find their own meaning.
Because it is not about the words. But people try to understand the words. That’s the jumping-off point to a deeper understanding.
I thought, Right. Note to self: dial it down.
Over To You
You’re not trying to impress anyone. You’re not trying to sound wise or special or enlightened.
You’re trying to connect. You’re trying to help.
And that means speaking their language, not yours.
You’ll get better at it the more conversations you have. You’ll start to notice which words land and which ones don’t. You’ll feel when someone is leaning in—and when they’ve completely checked out.
And if they check out?
Pause. Ask. Get curious.
You don’t need to talk over it. You don’t need to fill the silence.
Sometimes the best thing you can do is stop and say, “Where are you right now?” You might find they’re thinking about their dinner. Or you might find they’re sitting with something huge that’s just dropped.
But you won’t know unless you stop trying to be the expert and start being with them.
So yes, mind your language.
Not because you need to sound professional or polished. But because you want to be heard.
And when you’re heard?
Everything changes.
Action Step
Take one sentence you often use to describe your work and rewrite it in plain, everyday language. Bonus: try it out on someone who doesn’t know your work and ask if it makes sense.
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